First Cold of the New Year

So although I planned to be at the gym yesterday and also on Friday night, I didn't get there. Friday night we were experiencing near blizzard conditions, and I decided that I would just jump on the elliptical here in the basement. (I didn't.)

Yesterday morning, I woke up to a full blown viral infection of some sort with a runny nose and post-nasal drip making my throat sore. By lunchtime, I was experiencing chills and body aches. So I did not go run, ride the bike, jump on the elliptical, or anything else that translates into exercise. And today, I decided to skip church and get more rest in hopes that by tomorrow I will be up to working and going to the gym.

How's your first week going?

The second day of the New Year

Back to work...sigh...and I was just getting used to sleeping in!

I ate well today even though I didn't plan ahead. And I kept my deal with myself to go to the gym even though I was a bit tired. I put in 30+ minutes on the treadmill (including 10 minutes of running in intervals...I have never been a runner), and another hour on the elliptical. No weights today, but I plan to cool off from the spinning class tomorrow night with the arm machines.

Day three of the New Year??? It's gonna be great...now where did I hide the kids' candy canes???

One day at a time to the goal

Having made my weight loss goal, I am now in the lifelong phase of keeping the weight off. It seems to me that the key to being able to keep it off, is to keep a goal ahead of me. Since I am at a healthy weight, my goal has to be based upon something else.

My next goal is to walk the Bloomsday race in May. I have been in Spokane for five years at two different times, which means I've had 10 opportunities to walk/run this race. But I never have. (Okay, so at least two of those 10 times I was far enough along in a pregnancy to make it not as feasible.)

For those of you outside of the Inland Northwest, you just may not know what Bloomsday is. So you may be struggling to understand how walking Bloomsday is my next goal. It is a road race (12 km/7.46 miles). It starts downtown and heads west, winding along the river and then up DOOMSDAY hill, then meanders through the courthouse area and back downtown.

Anyways, it's an almost 8 mile walk/run. I will not be ready to run with the Elites this year, by any stretch. But I am committed to walking it under an hour and a half, perhaps I will even decide to jog most of it and do it under an hour. That hill will kill me, I know, but I'm going to do it.

With today being New Year's Day, the gym at the YMCA was closed. So the kids and I went to the iceskating arena for a Christian Skate Party. Two hours of solid movement in the cold. Hmmmm...I wonder how many calories I burned doing that??? It doesn't really matter. What matters is that I've made the commitment to exercise 5 days a week, and I found a creative way to get it in today even though the gym was closed on my regular day.

What is your goal?? How do you plan to get to it??

STAY ACTIVE: 2 hours iceskating

The Year in Review--2006

So, I started 2006 weighing in at 219 pounds. AAAGGH! How is it that didn't bother me more earlier than it did? In January, my middle child had fairly major surgery. We spent four days in the hospital and another two weeks vegging on the couch. None of this was really great for me, but it was just part of life.

In February, middle child went back to school and I cut red meat out of my diet after talking with many Adventist friends and research on my blood type. Immediately and over night, I lost 5 pounds and my moods stabilized. But I was still very overweight.

March drifted by. And April made its way in.

Mid-April, one day when I was home sick (a very rare thing for me to take a day off because I'm sick), I saw yet another commercial for Weight Watchers and LA Weight Loss. I had heard lots and lots about Weight Watchers, but knew NO ONE who had stuck with it. So, I decided to call LA Weight Loss and check it out. I officially started my program on April 17th. My weigh in was at 210.4 lbs.

May was okay. I was starting to really get with the program, and we started walking at the park on the weekends when the weather was nice. By Memorial Day weekend, I was down over 10 pounds and into the 100s. I was soooo excited to be back in the 100s.

By July 4th, I was down to 190. I couldn't believe it! I could buy clothes in the misses department for the first time in over six years. That was a tremendous milestone for me.

In August, I slowed down a bit, but finally hit 180 by late in the month. By the time school started for the kids in September, I had broken the 40 pounds lost mark.

In mid-September, my co-workers were astounded by my weight loss. The company agreed to match dollar for dollar our own "Biggest Loser" competition. To make it fair to everyone, we voted to do the competition based on body fat lost. I could do that! At my first measurement for the competition, I weighed in at 169 and with a body fat % of 37.0. (That's still high!)

As part of the competition, I committed to a rigorous workout program. I was in the gym 3-5 days a week, for no less than an hour per session. By November, I stepped up my workouts to 4-5 days a week, for no less than 90 minutes per session.

I made my initial weight loss goal of 155 in November, just before Thanksgiving, and quickly rebounded to 158. SIGH I didn't give up though. . .I just plugged away at the gym and kept eating right.

On December 19th, we had our final measurements for our "Biggest Loser" competition. My final weight was 154 and my ending body fat was 22.96. I lost 15 pounds and 14.04% body fat in just 12 weeks! Sadly, I didn't win the over $2000 grand prize. I came in second and received my entry fee back. But I WAS the biggest loser when you consider how far I'd come before there was money involved, and when you consider where I'm going. (In fairness, the competition was not handled well in the sense of how they used the measurements. It is my hope that next fall they will have another "Biggest Loser" competition and I can coordinate it in a way that is fair to everyone involved. My actual overall reduction in body fat was 40% and not 14.04. . .but that's a mathematical issue. . . )

So here I am today. I wear a size 10 jean. I can walk, bike, and swim. I am training to begin running, and ultimately, it is my goal to compete in a mini-triathlon and perhaps even a half-marathon (at least Bloomsday). My second goal is to quit smoking, which is an absolute must if I'm going to run long distances. My third goal is to continue working on my body fat percentage. My goal is to get down to 18% body fat, and in the process work on the problem areas of my body.

But here is what I promise myself for 2007: I will never wear a size larger than what I am today. And I will strive to become more and more healthy.

Here's to finding and keeping the best YOU in 2007!

Reaching the Goal

It's hard to believe that this time last year, I could barely walk up and down two flights of stairs without getting winded. I weighed in at 215 pounds last Christmas. But this was the year that I resolved to take better care of me.

Initially, that meant I was planning to splurge a little on me. I got a couple of manicures and pedicures. I bought "higher-end" clothing via thrift stores. I even bought accessories. But back in April, I decided that to really take better care of me, I needed to shed some weight.

Perhaps it was the 30th birthday looming before me. Maybe it was the invisibility of being an overweight woman in a mostly male workplace. Maybe it was just the insistence of my five year old that I could run, bike, swim just like he could, couldn't I?

No. I couldn't.

But, now I can! In the last eight months, I have dropped down to 154 pounds with a body fat percentage of 23%. I put in 10 hours/week at the gym. I bike, I row, I walk, I lift, and I'm starting to run. I have reached my weight loss goal!

So what's next?

*sigh*
My five year old is confident that I CAN and SHOULD be doing an Ironman competition. I, however, am much older and wiser than he (giggling). However, I have resolved to quit smoking this year and begin training for a mini-triathlon. Who knows! ? ! I might even try to RUN Bloomsday this spring (maybe not. . .I mean, I've never even walked it!). But my next goal is to welcome summer without the fear of a swimsuit, short sleeves, or shorts. And to run, bike, and swim to my heart's content. And on July 1st, 2007. . .I'm still going to weigh 154. On December 28, 2007. . .I'm still going to weigh 154.

Don't believe me! ? !

Stick around! (winks)

What does success taste like?

When I decided to invest in a weight loss program, I dropped some pretty substantial money (at least, for me). But I wanted to be serious about it. I needed the money as a driving factor. I needed the accountability of tracking my eating and exercise habits and telling someone why I did or didn't do what I knew I should. But I wrote that check still thinking that I would fail.

Not that I had failed that often. More often than not, I would tell myself I should do something, but never did anything about it. I rationalized that I didn't look like I weighed over 200 pounds. So it must not be too bad, right??? WRONG! But I still didn't believe that I could make it. I thought my body would fail me, that my mind would distract me, and that my heart would deceive me.

I wanted to taste success. I wanted to look in the mirror and like what I saw (not just rationalize that it couldn't be that bad. . .). I wanted to be able to run after a ball when playing with my kids. I wanted to be able to walk with my children (and grandchildren when I have them) without the use of a cane or walker. I wanted to be physically fit.

What I found was that I could make tiny successes. I went from drinking 12 cups of coffee a day to one cup. I went from drinking water only when there was absolutely nothing else available to craving it more than anything else. I went from choosing chocolate to choosing carrots, ricecakes, and bananas.

The journey was slow. My first official weigh in had me UP a pound! See, I told you this wouldn't work.

But, then in two weeks, I was down 4 pounds. After a month, I was down 13 pounds. Before I knew it, two months had passed and I was down a whole size. The clothes I had recently had to suck my gut in to get into were becoming loose and baggy. I had to wear belts.

By my 30th birthday, I was under 190, and quickly feeling better about myself. In late July, I went to a public pool and didn't wear a wrap over my swimsuit the WHOLE time. I hit a plateau in August, but by mid-September, I was safely in the low 170s.

Tomorrow I weigh in again. It has been 28 weeks, and to date, I have lost 55 pounds. My goal for tomorrow is to break into the 150s. I have less a pound to lose (since Tuesday--two days ago) to get there. I lost two pounds between Monday and Tuesday. I am now within five pounds of my goal weight! ! !

I have gone from a size 20 jean, to a size 12P. HOW AWESOME IS THAT!

And what I have found is this:

Success tastes like sweat after a good workout. It tastes like a fresh spinach salad. It feels like muscles burning from being worked. It looks like a woman in a slinky black dress, three inch heels and turning every head in the room.

Success requires commitment and will power. But most of it all, it requires CHANGE. What you did to get fat isn't going to help get you thin and healthy. It's a choice, and it won't be easy. But everyone can do it, when they make the commitment and effort.

YOU CAN DO IT TOO! Don't wait for anyone to encourage or tell you to do it. Make your own choice and just do it!

Wallowing in loathing

I am quite sure that we have all experienced a day where we wish we could go back to bed, and wake up with a redo of the day. Yesterday was one of those days for me. Along with battling to make good choices and lose weight, I am still a single parent. I work fulltime. I have no family in the immediate area (who am I kidding? I don't have biological family in the geographical area. . .closest blood relative is well over 1000 miles away!). And I am currently very stressed out.

My middle child came home from a weekend with dad not feeling well. Sore throat, followed by a nasty ear infection, followed by missing one day of work/school, picking him up early another day, leaving him with a friend ill, and missing yet another day of work/school (today). After seeing the urgent care doctor on Wednesday, and being reassured that we were doing the appropriate things to care for him, he woke up Thursday with a fever in excess of 102 and crying from extreme ear pain.

So in a moment of no judgment, I called a friend for advice. I was struggling with my priorities of missing yet another day of work and staying home with a sick kid. My gut said to stay home, but I didn't listen. I didn't listen to anything of reason that I should have. And that led to an action that is hanging over me that I wish I could go back and undo, but I can't.

My friend had the home number of my son's doctor. I didn't ask for it, but she gave it to me and suggested that I call him for advice. *sigh* My son has special medical needs, and we have been blessed with phenomenal doctors all along the road of his life. And I KNOW that there are certain protocols that you follow in getting care. I do REALLY KNOW this. *sigh*

But I ignored what I know (honestly, in that moment with the doctor's number in hand, I don't even know if I was in fact thinking, MISTAKE #1). I called the doctor at home. Early. I didn't realize a lot of things at this point. MISTAKE #2. I left a message, and got a very justly angry return phone call. *sigh*

I apologized, but the damage was done. He was very angry, and he has every right to be. I did what even I can't believe that I have done. His office called to "fit" us in later, but they were angry too. *sigh--justified anger* I needed a referral to get him seen, however, and I could not get through the red tape with the insurance company to get a referral and get him seen. I did, however, call back to the doctor's office, apologize, and let them know that I appreciated them trying to fit us in (especially in light of my HORRID behavior that morning), but that I could not get a referral and authorization that quickly.

So here is where I am. I am HATING myself for my actions. I have prayed and asked God to forgive me, and to give the doctor a heart that will "hear" my apology and forgive me. Part of me wants to send him a note at the office to apologize for my horribly unsound judgment and actions and to beg for his forgiveness. Part of me fears that will only compound the situation.

But right now, I just HATE what I did. And I can't shake it. I HATE that I became so stressed out and irrational that I would lose touch with what I know and do something so careless. I HATE that I may have ruined a relationship with a wonderful doctor. I HATE that I didn't have enough discernment to see that my very well-meaning friend was giving me less than great advice. I HATE that I can't look at myself in the mirror with any sort of pride about who I am today.

Pray for me. I need to be set free from my mistake. I know that is why Jesus hung and died on the cross, because I would make mistakes. But the deceiver seems to know that I have trouble forgiving myself for these kind of mistakes and is having a hayday with this one.

Pray that when I wake up tomorrow, the guilt and anger I feel towards myself will have ebbed away until I am at the healthy point of realizing my mistake, and learning from it.

Thanks. . .